Five Alternative Ways to Say "Well Done!"
By Maddie Thiele, Teacher - Burnley/South Yarra
As parents and educators, we would like the best for our children. We would like them to be confident learners, and to feel good about themselves when they are learning. We often find ourselves saying, “Good job!” and “Well done!” to motivate our little ones to keep learning. But our experience reveals that the following alternatives have a much stronger benefit in helping your child discover the world and the impact they have, than simply saying “good job!”
Here are five alternative ways of saying “good girl/boy” and “well done”:
1. Your child packs away their instrument in their Mini Maestros class without your instruction. Rather than simply saying, “Good girl,” be specific. I.e. “Great packing away. You did it by yourself today.” Soon enough, your child will be saying, “I did it!” and will be able to feel a sense of self-achievement, without relying on your praise.
2. Your child shows you a drawing they have done. Describe back to them what you see, and ask them to justify their choices. E.g. “I see you drew a purple tree, why did you decide to make it purple?” Your child will think about their choices, which will encourage them to make autonomous creative decisions in future.
3. Your 2 year old loves jumping, but can’t quite lift both feet off the floor at the same time yet. Tell them that you saw how hard they had to work to practise their jumps. “You are working so hard to get your feet off the floor! Soon you’ll be doing very big jumps!” This not only helps them understand the mechanics of jumping, but also acknowledges that they are capable of achieving their goal.
4. Use an opportunity where you would normally give praise to extend the child’s vocabulary. E.g. “Your hands were clapping delicately and gracefully today.”
5. Point out how your child’s actions affect others. When your child gives you a cuddle, say, “When you cuddle me, it makes me feel special and it’s a nice way to show me that you love me.” Or if your child shares their instrument with another child, say, “Toby is smiling – it looks like he is happy that you shared your tambourine with him.”
For further reading, see:
Alfie Kohn’s article, ‘Five Reasons to Stop Saying “Good Job!” from Young Children, September 2001. http://www.alfiekohn.org/article/five-reasons-stop-saying-good-job/
Rebecca English’s article, ‘How to discipline your children without rewards or punishment’ from The Conversation, March 2015. http://theconversation.com/how-to-discipline-your-children-without-rewards-or-punishment-39178
By Maddie Thiele.Mini Maestros Business Development Officer and Teacher – Burnley/South Yarra
- Term 3 classes - New enrolments are welcome at any time.
- Diving Deeper - Music and Vocabulary By Kitty Skeen - Mini Maestros Bendigo.
- Saturday classes in Burwood
- Diving Deeper - Lullaby and good night - hopefully... By Judy O'Neill
- Kodály, Orff, Dalcroze and Suzuki - By Jo Irwin - Mini Maestros Sunbury and Macedon Ranges Franchisee
- New Mini Maestros Customer App
- Diving Deeper - Connection by Maddy Kelly - Mini Maestros' Training & Development Manager
- Diving Deeper - Imagination. By Caroline Paterson
- Diving Deeper - Creativity by Kitty Skeen - Mini Maestros Bendigo Franchisee
- Interview with Dr Anita Collins – By Esther Bertram
- Onlooker Learners - By Emma Hart, Former Mini Maestros Head Of Teaching
- Meet The Team - Ally Hvalica
- Music and Intellectual Development - By Alison Cusack & Linda Repic
- Who is your child's best teacher? Part 1 of 2 By Emma Hart - Former Mini Maestros Head of Teaching
- Who is your child's best teacher? Part 2 of 2 By Emma Hart - Former Mini Maestros Head of Teaching
- Diving Deeper - Physical Skills - By Taryn Wright
- Inter-generational music making is building healthy communities
- Writing Music Down - by 3MBS
- Diving Deeper - Social Skills by Kate Rice
- The Importance of Repetition
- Diving Deeper - Learning to listen by Robyn Stewardson
- Meeting The Head Office Team - Esther Bertram - Marketing and Franchise Development Manager
- Meet the Team - Jo Irwin
- Diving Deeper - Imagination and Music By Lisa Marcolin
- Speech Development - Stories from Parents by Annette L. Graham
- Why Have Concerts? - By Emma Hart, Fomer Mini Maestros Head of Teaching
- Diving Deeper - The Power of Song by Kitty Skeen Part 1 of 2
- Diving Deeper - The Power of Song by Kitty Skeen Part 2 of 2
- Meeting the Head Office Team - Maddy Kelly
- Meeting The Head Office Team - Bruce Fethers - Co-owner & Managing Director
- Diving Deeper - Dance - by Cathy Edgar
- The Senses - By Robyn Grose
- Meeting The Head Office Team - Jennifer Smith - Co-owner & Music Director
- The Power of Music in Expressing Children's Emotions by Chantelle Alvaro
- Play - By Kate Howard
- Meeting The Head Office Team - Introducing Stephanie Migliore
- Relationships - By Ally Hvalica
- Developmental Milestones - By MaryRose Harrison
- Stories From Parents/Grandparents - Bobbie Carroll
- Meeting The Head Office Team - Introducing Monika Szilagyi
- JOY by Tiff Ikin
- Music Education
- Peekaboo Scarves by Emma Hart, Former Mini Maestros Head of Teaching
- All Shapes of the World
- Music Forever
- Children of Tomorrow: Thoughts On Mindful Music Education in the Early Childhood Space
- Nurturing the Love of Music
- Music. Feel it all over.
- Mini Maestros - It's Not Just About The Children.
- Mid-term Magic
- The Creative Life
- 5 Simple Ways to Nurture Creativity in Our Children
- Discovering the Joy of Music
- "Good morning Bumblebee"
- A Mini Maestros Moment
- The exchange between teacher and child
- The joy of being a new mum, and the importance of connection learning and play
- BABIES CLASSES - a very special and important time for you and your child.
- 5 Ways To Jam With Your Child At Home
- Was Your First Mini Maestros Class What You Expected?
- Moving to a Steady Beat and the Young Brain
- Learning an Instrument